|
Negative self-talk is a destructive habit and part of an
essential defence mechanism that we often develop to protect ourselves. Many people end up
talking themselves out of actions that may be scary or uncomfortable. 'I can't do this' is really just a way of saying "I don't want to deal with the
experience of doing this." We are all strongly influenced by our feelings, often
determining how and what action we ultimately take. If the feeling is uncomfortable,
negative self-talk results; then we often decide not to take any action at all.
 Many
people assume that if a past experience produced a certain result, there is nothing they
can do to change that experience in order to produce a different result. 'I've tried every diet there is. I know what I should do; I just can't do
it.'
Please understand that you can make the choice not to repeat old
patterns of eating, non-exercise, and negative thinking. You have the ability to choose
the emotions you have. If you don't like feeling guilty, frustrated, or doubtful, you can
choose not to. You, and no one else, must decide what is comfortable for you. In order to become successful at making healthy choices, you must avoid
negative self-talk and start practicing positive thinking.
Positive or negative self-talk plays a big part in your
decisions. Be on the look-out for negative self-talk and notice how it influences your
choices; notice how it can negatively affect your efforts to change. For example, perhaps
you've just returned from a week's vacation where you took a break from exercise and
low-fat eating. You tell yourself, 'I feel so fat. I'm back where I started.'
You feel guilty and frustrated. 'I don't have enough will-power to
start all over again. Maybe I'm just meant to be overweight.' Feeling overwhelmed and
discouraged, you give up.
 First, reflect
on the feelings you had before you decided to give up. You basically told yourself that
the healthy habits you learned before your vacation were all for nothing and that you have
to start over. Ask yourself if these feelings are reasonable. Are
you really back to ground zero? Of course not. You accepted change and developed a new way
of living; these skills are yours forever. The vacation
might even have done you some good: everyone needs a break sometimes. Otherwise, you might
have felt deprived and not really enjoyed yourself. It's
time now to tell yourself: 'It felt good eating whatever I wanted and taking a break from
exercising; I had a great time. But now I'm going to focus back on the low-fat, active
lifestyle I was enjoying before vacation. There is no
reason to beat myself up; I'll just take it one day at a time.' Now you can rethink your
previous decision and take action that will move you forward towards more positive change.
As you begin to understand your reasons for negative self-talk,
you'll find yourself recognising it more and more quickly after it occurs. Eventually, as
you practice, you'll be able to recognise and stop negative self-talk before it interferes
with your decisions.
It is very important to practise positive thinking and to remind
yourself that you're a worthwhile person whatever you do. Try to consistently acknowledge
that you are making positive changes to improve your health. You
should be proud of yourself. Visualise yourself as capable, happy, and confident. These positive feelings will help the process of change.
Remember, there are bound to be times when you're feeling
frustrated or depressed. Positive thinkers know that these feelings are valid, and they
don't try to ignore them. Positive thinkers acknowledge and try to understand them, but
they don't blame themselves for the conditions that lead to these feelings. Good luck, stay positive, and enjoy all the wonderful benefits of a
healthy lifestyle!
|
